Monday 31 January 2011

They would have thought I was a crazy lady

So here goes another possibility. CCSVI, after my first few chiropractor treatments re Atlas my blood flow noticably increased, I noticed as the viens in my hands became much more prominant. I have no doubt that those diagnosed mistakenly like myself with MS may have a constricted vein in the neck. A misaligned Atlas can alter blood pressure and I presume that this is also significant, CCSVI is not a cause of MS, but possibly a symptom of a misaligned Atlas.

A man to meet

I cant believe I found previous info re B. J. Palmer DC and back in 1934 too, How I would have loved to meet this man.

Bingo, at last, I havent read it all but somebody should

B.J. Palmer, D.C., reported management of Multiple Sclerosis patients with upper cervical chiropractic care as early as 1934. (7-8) In his writings, Palmer listed improvement or correction of symptoms such as "spasticity, muscle cramps, muscle contracture, joint stiffness, fatigue, neuralgia, neuritis, loss of bladder control, paralysis, incoordination, trouble walking, numbness, pain, foot drop, inability to walk, and muscle weakness." His chiropractic care included paraspinal thermal scanning using a neurocalometer (NCM), a cervical radiographic series to analyze injury to the upper cervical spine, and a specific upper cervical adjustment performed by hand.
While few of Palmer's Research Clinic cases were published, Palmer described one case of Multiple Sclerosis in detail. (8) The patient, a 38-year-old male, went to the Palmer Research Clinic in Davenport, Iowa, in 1943, after a diagnosis of MS by the Mayo Clinic. At the time of admission into the Palmer Clinic, this subject was "…helpless; he could not feed nor take care of himself." His medical history included a head/neck trauma at age 16 in which "…he fell ten feet off a building, landing on his head." The fall rendered him unconscious for thirty minutes and he reported having a sore neck for several days. At the Palmer Clinic, upper cervical radiographs showed a misalignment of the atlas to the right. After upper cervical chiropractic care, the patient remarked, "I am happy to say that through chiropractic, I have been made almost well. Today, I have just a little numbness left in my hands. I have the full use of my hands, feet, and my whole body."
During the past several decades, research linking chiropractic and MS has been virtually nonexistent. A literature search produced only two single case reports. One patient was adjusted with an instrument, while the other was managed with thoracolumbar manual chiropractic adjusting procedures. (9-10) No other references for the chiropractic management of MS patients were found. To the author's knowledge, the MS cases discussed in this report are the first documented using specific upper cervical care (cervical radiographs, thermal imaging, and knee-chest adjustments) since Palmer's research seventy years ago.
The following five individuals suffered from Multiple Sclerosis for one to ten years, ranged from 33 to 55 years of age, and had symptoms varying from mild to severe. All patients showed lesions on MRI (MS plaques) and were diagnosed with MS by their neurologist. Some concurrently were undergoing treatment with medications. The following report discusses the upper cervical chiropractic intervention in detail and summarizes the five cases' results.
IUCCA UPPER CERVICAL CHIROPRACTIC INTERVENTION
At each subject's first upper cervical chiropractic office visit, her/his medical history was discussed. In Case 1, a nine-year history of the typical relapsing-remitting pattern of MS symptoms was established. In Cases 2 through 5, MS symptoms were constant and progressively worsening without remission
Paraspinal digital infrared imaging, which measures cutaneous infrared heat emission, was chosen as the diagnostic test for neurophysiology. Thermography has been proven valid as a neurophysiological diagnostic imaging procedure with over 6000 peer-reviewed and indexed papers in the past 20 years. In blind studies comparing thermographic results to that of CAT scans, MRI, EMG, myelography, and surgery, thermography was shown to have a high degree of sensitivity (99.2%), specificity (up to 98%), predictive value, and reliability. (11-13) Thermal imaging has been effective as a diagnostic tool for breast cancer, repetitive strain injuries, headaches, spinal problems, TMJ conditions, pain syndromes, arthritis, and vascular disorders, to name a few. (14-23)
At each patient's first upper cervical chiropractic office visit, a paraspinal thermal analysis was performed from the level of C7 to the occiput according to thermographic protocol. (24-26) Compared to established normal values for the cervical spine, each of the five subject's paraspinal scans contained thermal asymmetries higher than 0.5 ºC. According to cervical thermographic guidelines, thermal asymmetries of 0.5ºC or higher indicate abnormal autonomic regulation or neuropathophysiology. (27-30) Because upper cervical misalignments were suspected in all five patients, a precision upp
er cervical radiographic series, including Lateral, A-P, A-P Open Mouth, and Base Posterior views, was performed at each patient's initial chiropractic office visit. (31) These four views enabled examination of the upper cervical spine in three dimensions: sagittal, coronal, and transverse. To maintain postural integrity, each subject was placed in a positioning chair using head clamps. Analysis of the four views was directed towards the osseous structures (foramen magnum, occipital condyles, atlas, and axis) that are intimately associated with the neural axis. Laterality and rotation of atlas and axis were measured according to each vertebra's deviation from the neural axis. (31) All five patients showed upper cervical misalignments.
Because the two criteria determining subluxation (thermal asymmetry and vertebral misalignment) were met in each case, a treatment plan was discussed with each patient. After each subject consented, chiropractic care began with an adjustment to correct the atlas/axis misalignment. To administer the adjustment, the patient was placed on a knee-chest table with his/her head turned to the direction of misalignment (left for left misalignments and right for right misalignments). The knee-chest posture was chosen because of the accessibility of the anatomy to be corrected. In addition, this posture retained spinal curvatures, thus preventing compression of the spine. Using the posterior arch of atlas as the contact point, an adjusting force was introduced by hand. (32) The adjustment's force (force = mass X acceleration) was generated using body drop (mass) and a toggle thrust (acceleration).
Then, each patient was placed in a post-adjustment recuperation suite for fifteen minutes as per thermographic protocol. (24-26) The adjustment's success was determined by reviewing the post-adjustment thermal scan. The first post-adjustment scans of all five patients revealed thermal differences of 0.1 ºC to 0.2ºC, which were considered normal according to established cervical thermographic guidelines (compared to the pre-adjustment differential of 0.5 ºC or greater). Therefore, resolution of each patient's presenting thermal asymmetry was achieved.
All subsequent office visits for each patient began with a thermal scan. An adjustment was administered only when the patient's presenting thermal asymmetry returned. If an adjustment was given, a second scan was performed after a fifteen-minute recuperation period to determine whether restoration of normal thermal symmetry had occurred. On average, each subject's office visits occurred three times per week for the first two weeks of care, two times per week for the following two weeks, and once per week for the subsequent month. After spinal stability was achieved (thermal asymmetry was rarely present), visits were reduced to once per month.
CASE 1
History: This 54-year-old female was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis at age 44 after a bout of optic neuritis, which prompted an MRI (MS plaques were visible). Over the next nine years, she experienced a minimum of one exacerbation per year lasting an average of one month. She recovered completely each time except for partial vision loss resulting from optic neuritis. The most recent flare-up occurred at age 53 when she experienced numbness that switched from side-to-side in her body. With this exacerbation, no remission occurred. Symptoms included tingling in her arms, hands, legs, and feet as well as a positive L'hermitte's Sign (pain, numbness, tingling down extremities upon cervical flexion). After these symptoms were present for three months, this subject's neurologist surmised her condition was worsening and recommended drug therapy. Due to her concerns over long-term drug use, this patient chose to undergo upper cervical chiropractic care first.
Exam: During her initial chiropractic examination, this subject showed reduced sensitivity bilaterally in her arms, hands, legs, and feet. L'hermitte's Sign was present during cervical flexion and right lateral flexion compression was positive. The subject reported experiencing these symptoms constantly for the three months prior to her chiropractic exam. Cervical ranges of motion were reduced during left lateral bending and left rotation. She reported visual loss from previous optic neuritis episodes. Computerized thermal imaging showed thermal asymmetries as high as 1.0 ºC. Analysis of cervical radiographs revealed left laterality and left anterior rotation of atlas.
Outcome: Immediately following this subject's first upper cervical adjustment, Lhermitte's Sign was no longer present. During the following week, normal sensation returned to her extremities. After two weeks of upper cervical care, cervical ranges of motion no longer produced pain and cervical compression tests were negative. At the end of week four, this patient reported improved vision in her left eye (which had been damaged by the episode of optic neuritis ten years earlier). After four weeks of upper cervical care, this subject's neurologist reexamined her and no longer recommended drug therapy. Two years after beginning upper cervical care, this subject remained symptom-free.
Summary: This patient experienced a minimum of one relapse per year for the ten years prior to upper cervical care. After upper cervical intervention, two years passed without reoccurrence of symptoms.
CASE 2
History: After this 33-year-old male noticed visual changes at age 30, he was examined by a neuro-opthalmologist and showed 20/30 vision in the right eye (according to the Snellen eye chart examination). After an MRI showed three brain lesions (MS plaques), he was diagnosed with MS. The year following his diagnosis, this subject showed minimal deterioration in his condition. However, during the subsequent two years, he experienced chronic progression of MS symptoms. In addition to vision loss, he suffered from loss of bladder control, constipation, loss of balance, sensory deficits in his extremities, and L'hermitte's sign. Three years after the MS diagnosis, he was reexamined by his neuro-opthalmologist who noted his optic nerves appeared pale and his vision had deteriorated to 20/400 in the right eye and 20/200 in the left eye. He was declared legally blind. A follow-up MRI showed ten lesions, one active. This subject began upper cervical care soon after the second MRI.
Exam: During this patient's initial examination, he reported wearing sunglasses at all times, even indoors, due to light sensitivity. L'hermitte's Sign was present. Sensitivity was reduced in his hands and feet. Heat aggravated his symptoms. He showed inability to balance on one foot bilaterally and to walk heel-to-toe in a straight line. As a result, he reported frequent falls on hiking trails. He reported difficulty with bladder control (he urinated six times per night) and constipation (averaging four to five days without a bowel movement). He also suffered with memory loss (he carried a tape recorder to remind himself of errands, etc.), insomnia, and fatigue. Most of his MS symptoms had progressively worsened during the second and third years following his diagnosis and had been constant for at least one year. Analysis of cervical radiographs revealed left laterality of atlas. Computerized thermal imaging showed thermal asymmetries as high as 0.8ºC.
Outcome: After the first upper cervical adjustment, L'hermitte's Sign was absent and balancing on his left leg improved (both symptoms had been present for one year or greater). One week later, he reported that due to less light sensitivity, he was able to leave his sunglasses off, even outdoors. Upon visual reexamination one month later, he tested 20/160 bilaterally. Six months later, balancing on both left and right legs improved, so he was able to resume hiking while carrying a heavy backpack. He also was able to take hot showers and sit in jacuzzis because heat no longer aggravated his symptoms. In addition, normal sensation returned to his extremities, bladder control improved (urination occurred once per night), and constipation improved (one bowel movement per day).
Summary: During the two years prior to chiropractic care, this patient experienced a progressive worsening of MS symptoms. Most symptoms had been present constantly for at least one year prior to the start of upper cervical care. After the intervention of chiropractic care, this subject reported immediate correction of some symptoms as well as gradual improvement of other symptoms over several months. One year after beginning care, this patient reported an overall correction and/or improvement in MS symptoms.
CASE 3
History: This 46-year-old female first experienced symptoms of MS at age 44, when she noticed memory and cognitive problems (inability to formulate thoughts or words), frequent urination and loss of bladder control (loss of muscular control to begin and end urination). She was diagnosed with MS after an MRI showed active brain lesions. Her symptoms remained constant without worsening until the addition of sensory deficits (painful tingling) in her arms and legs, two years after her diagnosis.
Exam: At her initial chiropractic examination, this subject reported feeling continuous, painful tingling and loss of sensation in both arms and legs during the previous month. She complained of a weakness in her legs that she described as "a rubbery feeling." She also had difficulty with cognition and bladder control for the previous two years. She complained of generalized stiffness and aching in her neck. Cervical extension was reduced and painful. Analysis of cervical radiographs revealed right laterality and right posterior rotation of atlas. Computerized thermal imaging showed 0.5ºC thermal asymmetries.
Outcome: Within the first week of upper cervical care, this subject reported improved bladder control (resumption of muscular control during urination) and a decrease in numbing, tingling, and pain in her left leg and right hand. One month later, her leg strength returned and numbness was noted only in her left hand. In addition, memory and cognitive ability returned to normal. After two months of care, bladder control, sensitivity, and strength in her extremities returned to normal. After four months of upper cervical care, this subject reported the absence of all MS symptoms. A follow-up MRI showed no new lesions as well as a reduction in intensity of the original lesions. During the subsequent six months, this patient was examined once per month with digital infrared imaging. An adjustment was necessary on three visits. At each of those three occasions, a minor reoccurrence of symptoms also existed, which was corrected following each adjustment. No other flare-ups occurred.
Summary: Most of this patient's MS symptoms (except one month of sensory deficits) had been present for two years prior to the start of upper cervical care. After the intervention of upper cervical chiropractic care, the patient's MS symptoms gradually improved over several months. After one year of care, this individual primarily remained asymptomatic.
CASE 4
History: This 55-year-old female was diagnosed with MS nine years ago at age 46 after an MRI confirmed active brain lesions. Her symptoms included painful paresthesia of her left arm, fatigue, mental confusion, insomnia, and lack of coordination of her right arm and leg. All symptoms progressively worsened over the nine-year period. Seven years after her diagnosis, a follow-up MRI confirmed the addition of new active lesions. Due to the fatigue, confusion, and pain, she had been on disability leave from work for several years.
Exam: During this patient's initial exam, she complained of extreme pain in her left arm, requiring multiple doses per day of pain medication (neurontin). She also took daily medication for sleeping (klonopin) and energy level (amantadine) due to her insomnia and fatigue. Her handwriting coordination (right-handed) was poor so she preferred using a computer. Cervical radiographs depicted a misalignment of her atlas to the right and posterior. Computerized thermal imaging revealed thermal asymmetries of 0.5ºC.
Outcome: During the first week of upper cervical care, this subject noticed an increase in energy level. One month later, she no longer noticed arm pain. Consequently, she consulted with her neurologist to reduce her pain medication. Her pain medication was reduced by two-thirds and she had no occurrences of arm pain. This patient also reported a continued increase in energy level and a renewed sense of mental clarity, so she considered looking for a part-time job. She felt "more alert and energized" and her "mind was clear." Four months after the start of upper cervical care her condition continued to improve without any relapses.
Summary: For the nine years prior to upper cervical care, this patient suffered from a chronic, progressive worsening of MS symptoms. Since the intervention of upper cervical care, this individual experienced improvements in MS symptoms and required less medication.
CASE 5
History: This 43-year-old female first experienced symptoms of MS seven years ago. The symptoms included numbness in her legs, hands, and face, and lasted for two weeks. No further symptoms occurred until six years later with the onset of L'hermitte's Sign. Soon after L'hermitte's Sign began, this patient noticed loss of grip strength and a spasmodic curling of her left hand. After an MRI, she was diagnosed with MS. Because Lhermitte's Sign was present every time she nodded her head causing her pain, she began daily pain medications (neurontin). After the symptoms were constantly present for six months, she began upper cervical care.
Exam: During her initial chiropractic exam, cervical flexion produced L'hermitte's Sign. Cervical extension and left rotation were reduced and painful. She reported constant tingling in her left arm, grip strength loss in her left hand, and weakness and pain in both forearms. She experienced aggravation of forearm pain while taking notes in class. As an avid martial arts participant, she expressed concern over her inability to perform push-ups in class due to exacerbation of L'hermitte's Sign. She also reported experiencing dizzy spells several times per day for many years. Cervical radiographs depicted right laterality of atlas. Computerized thermal imaging revealed thermal asymmetries of 0.5ºC.
Outcome: After the first upper cervical adjustment, this patient noted reduction in intensity of L'hermitte's Sign. By the end of two weeks of care, L'hermitte's Sign was noticeable only occasionally and no dizzy spells had occurred. After four weeks of care, this patient no longer reported experiencing any dizzy spells, arm pain, tingling, forearm weakness, or L'hermitte's Sign. Consequently, she reduced her pain medication dosage. In addition, she resumed taking notes in class and performing pushups in her martial arts class without pain or tingling.
Summary: This subject's symptoms were present constantly for six months prior to upper cervical care. With the intervention of chiropractic care, symptoms were reversed either immediately or over one month's time.
RESULTS
At their first upper cervical chiropractic office visits, computerized thermal scans showed thermal asymmetries and cervical radiographs showed upper cervical misalignments in all five subjects. Because these exam findings indicated upper cervical injuries, all five patients consented to upper cervical chiropractic care. The five subjects underwent upper cervical care for a minimum of four months and a maximum of two years at the time of this paper's submission for publication. Before the intervention of upper cervical chiropractic care, four out of the five patients (Cases 2 through 5) showed patterns of constant, progressive MS symptoms for a minimum of six months. After upper cervical care, MS symptoms were improved or corrected, including L'hermitte's Sign, paresthesias, pain, balance, muscle weakness, bladder control, bowel control, cognitive ability, vision loss, insomnia, dizziness, and fatigue. The only case that followed the typical MS relapse-remit pattern, Case 1, had a history of MS relapses once per year for nine years. After the intervention of upper cervical care, this subject had no further relapses and remained symptom-free for two years. Therefore, results of the five cases indicated that upper cervical chiropractic care prevented the progression of MS, stopped the MS relapse pattern, and improved and/or reversed symptoms of
DISCUSSION
An important parallel in the MS patients' medical histories was their recollection of head and/or neck trauma(s) prior to the onset of MS (also mentioned in the Palmer case described in the Introduction). All five patients remembered specific incidences of trauma preceding the onset of MS symptoms such as a fall on an icy sidewalk, an auto accident, and a ski accident. In addition, all five individuals showed evidence of upper cervical injury during exams (digital infrared imaging and cervical radiographs). The body of medical literature detailing a possible trauma-induced etiology for MS, or at least a contribution, is substantial. (33-35) In fact, medical research has established a connection between spinal trauma and numerous neurological conditions besides Multiple Sclerosis, including Parkinson's Disease, Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS), epilepsy, migraine headaches, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD), vertigo, and bipolar disorder, to name a few. (36-43)
While medical research has shown that trauma may lead to MS and the other neurological conditions mentioned above, no mechanism has been defined. It is the author's hypothesis that the missing link may be the injury to the upper cervical spine. While various theories have been proposed to explain the effects of chiropractic adjustments, a combination of several theories seems most likely to explain the profound changes seen in these MS patients due to upper cervical chiropractic care. After a spinal injury, central nervous system (CNS) facilitation can occur from an increase in afferent signals to the spinal cord and/or brain coming from articular mechanoreceptors. (44-48) The upper cervical spine is uniquely suited to this condition because it possesses inherently poor biomechanical stability along with the greatest concentration of spinal mechanoreceptors.
Hyperafferent activation (through CNS facilitation) of the sympathetic vasomotor center in the brainstem and/or the superior cervical ganglion may lead to changes in cerebral blood flow, including ischemia. (49-55) Because of the close association between the nervous and immune systems (the immune system recently has been reclassified as the neuroimmune system), upper cervical injuries affecting sympathetic function consequently may cause a cascade of non-favorable immune responses. (56-58) Among these are uncoordinated immune tissue responses (auto-immune responses) and the release of cortisol, which ultimately can result in decreased immune function.
It is likely that the five MS patients sustained injuries to their upper cervical spines (visualized on cervical radiographs) during spinal traumas they experienced. It is also likely that due to the injuries, through the mechanisms described previously, sympathetic malfunction occurred (measured by paraspinal digital infrared imaging), possibly causing decreases in cerebral blood flow. Consequently, because the nervous and immune systems are so closely intertwined, it is possible that CNS facilitation and cerebral ischemia could have stimulated an auto-immune response such as myelin destruction. According to the results of each of the five patients discussed in this report, it seems correction of the upper cervical injury not only stopped but also reversed the pathological processes involved in MS. However, few conclusions can be drawn from a small number of cases. Therefore, further research is recommended to study the link between trauma, the upper cervical spine, and neurological disease.
CONCLUSION
All five patients discussed in this report recalled experiencing head or neck trauma(s) prior to the onset of Multiple Sclerosis symptoms. In all five cases, evidence of upper cervical injury was found using paraspinal digital infrared imaging and upper cervical radiographs. After IUCCA upper cervical chiropractic care, all five cases reviewed revealed improvements in Multiple Sclerosis symptoms. In fact, correction of the five patients' upper cervical injuries appeared to stimulate a reversal in the progression of MS symptoms. To the author's knowledge, these are the first cases reported on this topic using thermal imaging and knee-chest adjustments since Palmer's research seventy years ago. Further investigation into upper cervical injury and resulting neuropathophysiology as a possible etiology or contributing factor to Multiple Sclerosis should be pursued.

Now this is interesting

B.J. Palmer, D.C., reported management of Multiple Sclerosis patients with upper cervical chiropractic care as early as 1934. (7-8) In his writings, Palmer listed improvement or correction of symptoms such as "spasticity, muscle cramps, muscle contracture, joint stiffness, fatigue, neuralgia, neuritis, loss of bladder control, paralysis, incoordination, trouble walking, numbness, pain, foot drop, inability to walk, and muscle weakness." His chiropractic care included paraspinal thermal scanning using a neurocalometer (NCM), a cervical radiographic series to analyze injury to the upper cervical spine, and a specific upper cervical adjustment performed by hand.
While few of Palmer's Research Clinic cases were published, Palmer described one case of Multiple Sclerosis in detail. (8) The patient, a 38-year-old male, went to the Palmer Research Clinic in Davenport, Iowa, in 1943, after a diagnosis of MS by the Mayo Clinic. At the time of admission into the Palmer Clinic, this subject was "…helpless; he could not feed nor take care of himself." His medical history included a head/neck trauma at age 16 in which "…he fell ten feet off a building, landing on his head." The fall rendered him unconscious for thirty minutes and he reported having a sore neck for several days. At the Palmer Clinic, upper cervical radiographs showed a misalignment of the atlas to the right. After upper cervical chiropractic care, the patient remarked, "I am happy to say that through chiropractic, I have been made almost well. Today, I have just a little numbness left in my hands. I have the full use of my hands, feet, and my whole body."
During the past several decades, research linking chiropractic and MS has been virtually nonexistent. A literature search produced only two single case reports. One patient was adjusted with an instrument, while the other was managed with thoracolumbar manual chiropractic adjusting procedures. (9-10) No other references for the chiropractic management of MS patients were found. To the author's knowledge, the MS cases discussed in this report are the first documented using specific upper cervical care (cervical radiographs, thermal imaging, and knee-chest adjustments) since Palmer's research seventy years ago.

whoever it was

Somebody decided that the conditionof MS was going to enter my life, by diagnosing on false information. It is not Neurologist or Doctors fault, both of these are incredibly clever men and women in the medical world, they both contribute so much goodness in many difficult and frightening circumstances especially in the treatment of cancers and other life changing conditions.

Is it Scientists fault, with all their fruitless endeavers to successfully find a cure. No its not their fault they are working along a certain protocol given, deviation from that is not accepted.

No, the responsibility of this lifechanging mistake goes much higher, to those that have dictated the perameters for all the above to work under. Somebody made the catastrophic mistake to exclude Chiropractors from any kind of opinion, this could have been picked up on years ago. Whoever made that decission is responsible for my circumstances, there can be no scape goat on this one, as many have been involved in decission making over many years. And that has had its knock on effects to many others, in countries that have relied on information passed to them from those who were deemed to know better.


 But then again perhaps I'm a one off, one of lifes conundrums, unique. Well that is not a discription I would relate to, I'm basically very ordinary really, nothing unique about me, so I guess not.

Woops!!

Sunday 30 January 2011

View with new eyes, and they will then see

I thought I would just take a look at the history of ms, andto me all the writings about the immune system, effects on nervous system, meylin sheath damage etc etc just mean nothing to me, it has no bearing on my owmn findings. To me its total nonsense, all about messages getting through and being effected by meylin damage is just so incorrect.  If the spinal chord is comprimised by misalignment caused by the Atlas messages won't get through, I know this as a fact, but I know when I am re aligned, that the message service from my brain to my bladder will be resumed.

No wonder I thought that I was going do lally as how can I know these things, scientists, doctors, neurologists well they must be right, but what facts are they basing their theories on, well actually  no fact, no FACTS at all it is all just a misguided assumption, and it is wrong,  my bloodflow and eyesight has been effected, I even had an eyetest and yes there was improvement. Yes it is off at the moment but no where near to the degree that it was, it seems to slightly fluctuate depending on my stance, but it will all come right in the end.

So from theories going back to the 19th century are wrong and I know that they are. It all has to be rethought out with fresh young eyes,the ms book needs to be thrown out, and to start at scratch again, which enables new ideas to come to the fore, more and more young adults are being wrongly diagnosed this is a travesty. Get Chiropractors working with the NHS then there will be real visual progress.

Now I know

I do not see ms as a horendous disease, because I no longer suffer with its thoughts, and becauseof positive treatments I am now having and that I now know what alternative issues i have and all that ms stands for. and that is NOTHING! it just complicates a treatable underlying issue.

The reason people have cognative issues is because they fill their head with all thats ms to such a capacity, itis impossible to keep and retain any other everyday info, and unfortunately via websites, they continuously are given further info and symptoms to consider, its non stop there is oodles of stuff out there, and it all lacks any kind of proven FACT.

Mindblowing I know, but the ball I now hold, is the one that I will now run with.

This may help me

There is one thing that does bother me and causes me to cry quite often and that is the fact that in the very very beginning before  my misdiagnosis was even on the cards, I ignored that very first warning to hanh fire on the old stress, this in a way was a double edged sword so if I had of I wouldnt have my youngest son Brad and that weighs very heavy on my heart. So in a perverse kind of way in the beginning it was all my fault,I wouldnt have had these last years of total misery and upset, if only I had listened. You see my very first warning had nothing to do with my balance being effected, so my Atlas would have remained in tact. It was a sensuary thing down my left side and I felt a little out of sorts.

I have to try and stop blaming myself and the fact that my personality gave my other half continuous, benefits of the doubt, forgiveness and second chances, he just wasnt the dependable reliable partner that he should have been, so therefore I took on his responsibilities as a parent and homemaker, I took on it all.

I now beat myself up, telling myself in my head how stupid and gullible that I had been. when in fact I should not, it wasnt my fault, just a set of very difficult circumstances, I am hoping that actually writing this down may help me to stop it and break the cycle, as does all make me incredibky sad, and having no-one to share and understand these thoughts make it a lonely cross to bear.

So call this blog my therapy, lets hope it has worked in putting this particular thing to bed.

no pain no gain

So as usual as the end of the day nears Istart to feel sore, mainly in my lower back, but I can deal with it.
I remembered yesterday that John had said on Fri that he had only seen the sort of tightness that I have down my right leg, in new born babies that have been curled up in the womb. It occurs to me last night that I sleep in that same way as I bring my knees right up and sometimes hold them, so this week I am going to concerntrate in not doing that anymore. hey! I've got nothing to lose, and did feel a bit better this morning, not so tight/tense. When my body does finally relax totally, I think I will sleep for a week.

Mental Health

I think that the whole Mental Health issue is greatly misunderstood by some. Over the few years mine has been in every scenario you can think of.

I have stood on that very fine line between sanity and insanity, only for a moment but an incredibly scarey place to be,

I had withdrawel when coming off an antideppresent effexor/venlaflaxine, now luckily I expected some oddities, so when paranoiya set in for a few days, I just hung on in there hoping that it would soon pass, and it did.





There are many other situations, not having the "fight or "flight" ability also creates some anxiety issues.

I now have no fear for myself, as I have had to confront them, I'm not even scared of spiders any more.

My Dad was diagnosed with cancer, had a marriage seperation, found out an affair was happening, mother-in-law died and my son got excluded from school, all within a matter of weeks of eachother.

I now in the last 3 months stopped taking anti deppressants, I could do tis because today I am strong mentally, took some knocks and ups and downs getting here, but I got here all the same.

Antidepressant should just be given to give extra support  whilst we deal with the issues that effect us mentally, they shouldnt always be needed long term, as the cause of the depression needs to be sorted and dealt with, not just covered up.

I am lucky I have radically changed my life and am now strong, others need the support and help to do the same.

Saturday 29 January 2011

so far so good

After my chiro apptmnt on Friday, I was feeling so sore as had quite a number of adjustnents from top to bottom of my spine and hips, My spine felt as if it was burning very uncomfortable. Anyway this morning feels muc better. I am always better at the start of the day, but get sore nearer the end of the day, I reckon that the stress tha tit takes to keep upright and holding my head upright, must take its toll. But at the moment so far so good.

childhood stresses

When children, as I fear will be the case, start to be diagnosed with ms, then the system that exists today, becomes critical, if as flawed as I suspect, society places untold stresses, anxieties and standards to achieve by our young folk at school, not to mention other youth related stresses, such as puberty which comes with a whole new catalogue of issues etc, peer pressure, bullying etc etc the list continues, if we all think back to our youth, we can all come up with something, but we coped, it was no big deal and we were allowed to merrily move on, today isuues are different, have more serious consequences. My chilhood was simple non complicated, todays is a whole different ballgame and sadly most of it has been created by adults.

Friday 28 January 2011

if the bladder was first

If the bladder was the first problem that occured, a reoccuring UTI, also my balance had been off for a while but never, ever mentioned that as didnt seem relevant at the time, so my twisting caused my bladder problems, then I conclude that there are a lot of me's out there, a lot me thinks.

Sore but good

I have woken up sore and uncomfortable, its funny went for a wee and a lot of the tension down my right leg releases a little, plus I find as I am now doing if I sit up right for a while my weight gradually goes don through to the heals of my feet, it takes a few minutes for my right heel to go to the floor, but if I don't try too hard, i just releases and goes to the floor. When I went to see chiro yesterday he said yet again that I didnt sit as twisted, and some areas in my back were less tense. I never ask for his professional oppinion as to whether he considers that I have ms or not, as it wouldnt be fair and I already know the answer. From the very beginning we had an agreement that he treated me as just me, and not someone who has ms and that was exactly what he wanted, he also doesnt believe in xrays, which is also a good thing as not all neck issues show up on them, I have read not even on an MRI. I can understand that as you stand or lay in a certain position and may at that moment just fall into position..

Hit and miss but we will get there

I'm off to see Chiro John in an hour, what a relief, my right side is really tight and tense and I can't yet straighten my right leg due to painful calf muscle. Hopefully we will make some kind of headway on these remaining problems. We have come to the stage where we both ourselves need to suss out what the reasons are, as we seem to be at point no-one else seems to have reached. So if we both put our heads together and after a bit of hit and miss, hopefully we will be able to crack it sooner rather than later, as where my ribs seem to hit my hips does cause discomfort so I do have to be careful to avoid this happening.But I am sure he can help with this as he eased it before for me.

part 2  Well I return, as per usual feel sore but no pain no gain, he adjusted my hips, adjusted my Atlas neck and back, I'm always a bit sore etc until about Weds then I notice different improvements. I do drink at least1ltr of water per day to clean my system of yucky stuff. I may be sore for the next few days, but i'm not dying and it is so good to know what I am now dealing with, and ms is nowhere to be seen. its just great

Thursday 27 January 2011

dont be eager for a diagnosis

So Sophie06 on mss web site, all her tests came back clear MRI, Lumber Puncture and Evoked Potentials.

But she has symptoms indicative to ms, which in my case some were stress related, and now I am sure my bladder was the first thing effected due to my spine being comprimised by the Atlas which had an effect on the bladder meridian which runs down the spine and the internal twisting un noticable externally as yet, or affected the bladder directly as took place in the lower back area. The only symptom I have never had is fatigue. Sophie has sensury problems, fatigue, balance etc.  I believe as my first blip was my system warning me to keep stress at bay in the background, because at the time I didnt understand that it was only a warning, I ignored its message. therefore the second was more severe, effecting my balance and 1/2 second delay but when delay went Icouldnt revert back as my Atlas was now out of line.

I thought I couldnt walk for psychological reasons (axieties etc) but it was for physical reasons, something that I am now aware of and now can address.

The body is an incredible system and sends out many signals for many different reasons, they may be subtle ones but warnings all the same. Stress can be so destructive, and can cause havoc with the system effecting digestion, the heart, the mind and even fertility.

In my opinion the ms that has been created, by heresay and assumptions for years is a fictitious condition which appears very real to Neuro and Patient.

Also pressure points have played a big part, they are located in the neck shoulder area lower back and leg also abdomen. And then add lymphatic system another aspect and it all becomes very complex indeed.

Sophie has a choice, but there is no-one who can give it to her.


Bottom line is you can't CURE what does not EXIST

It all adds up

WHY IT IS IMPORTANT TO CORRECT THE POSITION OF THE ATLAS
 
Bandscheibenvorfall   
When the vertebrae that constitute the spinal column are in the correct position, weights are distributed evenly between the two sides of the skeleton.
The considerable weight of the head (as much as 5-6 kg) is supported entirely by the Atlas.
Misalignment of the Atlas creates an unbalanced supporting base for the skull on top of the spinal column, so that it is no longer perpendicular with respect to the vertebrae, as though it were resting on an inclined plane. This produces a shift in the body’s centre of gravity and therefore an imbalance in the entire posture, from the head to the feet. 90% of all postural receptors are located in the upper cervical spine. They are responsible for sensing the position and movement of the body therefore disbalances in these region have negative impacts on the entire body statics. Most of the static load is transferred to one side of the body rather than the other. This imbalance is measurable with two ordinary sets of scales, which in some cases may indicate a difference of up to 20 Kg. The first cervical vertebra affects the equilibrium of the whole skeleton. The ligaments and muscles of the Sub-Occipital region, in their constant exertion to keep the position of the head aligned with the cervical spine, are under stress and eventually go into spasm.
This can give rise to cervical problems such as tensive headache, dizziness, torticollis, or asymmetrical or limited rotation of the head. In a chain-reaction process, misalignment of the Atlas can cause asymmetries of the entire skeleton, such as one shoulder higher than the other with pain in the scapula, scoliosis, tilted pelvis with consequent danger of herniated discs , pain in the back, the hips, the knees and even the feet. When the posture is not what it should be, permanent muscular contractions develop which, as well as being painful, can cause shifts (subluxations) in other vertebrae in the column, providing work in due course for chiropractors and osteopaths. Subluxations can create persistent compression on certain nerve roots, which in time become irritated. The most common approach used by doctors to treat this irritation is injections of cortisone, which produce serious side-effects. The compression of certain nerves causes “pins and needles” or makes an arm or a leg “go to sleep”, and can result in a malfunction of the respective organs connected to these nerve roots, giving rise to a series of disturbances throughout the body, even in apparently unrelated areas. Another consequence of muscles that are thickened and hardened by the constant tension to which they are subjected is compression of the lymphatic canals, veins and arteries that pass through these muscles, causing a reduction in the supply of lymph and blood and the digestion of the waste products of these muscles. There are certainly other factors to be taken into account that can affect correct posture, but wrong alignment of the Atlas can be absolutely decisive. Experience has shown that in many cases, after a simple correction of the Atlas, the skeleton takes on a more correct and natural shape.

I musnt forget how far I've come

I have to keep reminding myself how far I've come and the inprovements that I have received, through the acupuncture on the bladder line, and now chiropractor treatment, so I now shall list them to remind me:

*No more urgency to wee
*No more accidents at all
*Can tolerate heat now (this will be third year)
*Dont fall out of bed when shifting position.
*Dont fall automatically forward, when picking up something off of the floor, landing on my face
*Takes 5mins to put on my shoes, not 1/2 hour
*can sit in a chair to put makeup on
*Pain decreased by 80%
*Now intermitantly in lower back area
*Neck pain practically gone
*upper body strength returning
*Accute anxiety gone
*Stopped anti-depressants
*Spasm gone
*tremor gone
*no longer take baclofen

I cant stand due to tightness in calf muscle, and hip still a bit twisted, but hey! I'll get there, there are other little things but I cant remember at the mo.

Wednesday 26 January 2011

Healing Crisis

Whilst going through the process of manipulations to my spine, to enable me to straighten. One thing that has been invaluable to me, is the Healing Crisis. There are several issues that I have gone through, restlessness and insomnia being the reasons as to why I am awake at this moment. It drives me nuts but its a small price to pay as the end result will outway all these things I've counted nine points so far, I'm no to keen on the tearful one, but hey ho! I can be happy one minute and blubbing the next, over something really silly. Drinking water has been very important, some days it is obvious to me that I need to drink, as I get really thirsty, but I do make sure that I drink 1-2 litres a day now, it flushes out my system. Compared to the nervous wreck that I was, even scared of the phone ringing as I would just pannick, anxious at most situations. Now totally different, I may be housebound at the moment, but I certainly dont intend staying that way.

Well I suppose I best stop, relax and try and get a bit more sleep.

Whats going on!!!!!

There is talk of Methotrexate being prescribed now. This is just mad, the side effects dont look good

This is yet another sign of desperation, if they are like me and misdiagnosed with ms, well words fail me.

my mechanics

I have spent years with my head in my legs, always focussing on my feet. but from now on, as my upper body is so much stronger, I shall concerntrate on the centre of my body more, learning to trust my bum and move my legs from the hip. I think over time, I have avoided relying on these areas, as they were a bit dodgy, but it is now time to reintroduce them into my mechanics of movement. I'll give it a try anyway.

debate

Someone on MSS website has asked for a seperate board for debate issues. Well hello! thats why I am here, the mss is the last place that would accept alternative debate, as that was what I am all about,  I see it from a whole different angle.,  I am lucky I've had my children. and it must be awful for young adults to have their whole future now dictated to them, but mistakes may have been made, now that needs addressing with some urgency.

The ms society have received much in the form of donations from the general public, trusting that they are working for all of us diagnosed with ms. But in my oppinion by  focussing solely on all medical aspects and not the alternatives and also by not challenging and investigating past incorrect theories, they certainly are not helping those like me, no not at all and this over many many years.

Another there seems to be a failure to have compiled comprehensive statistics on those diagnosed, i.e occupation. environment, age, stress relation etc etc etc, surely between the NHS and th ms society there is some capability of organising some invaluable statistics to be compiled. The information that can be gathered from the site alone is incredibly useful, everybody is so candid and informative and come up with some brilliant theories etc of their own, it is all very very interesting, their are many others who have questions about issues, but there is no-one to ask. I have found my answers, I hope some day soon to be able to prove and share them. And until that time, I shall not flood the system with more yet again unproven theory.


I am my own proof, I have faith in myself, I will succed in producing fact.

Yet another poem

It taps at the window,
It knocks at the door,
It seeps through the ceiling,
And slides in on the floor,

Its always around you,
At the back of your mind,
It will cause you big trouble,
And that you will find.

You have to destroy it,
kick it right into touch,
Does it still effect you,
No, not  half as much.

So it can tap at the window,
And knock at the door,
But now let it in,
No way, not anymore.


The thing that I speak of,
Hey! presto it's stress,
But keep it at distance,
And it cant cause a mess.



By:  ME

Sunday 23 January 2011

Are we our worst enemies

Perhaps  modern day society that exist today is actually killing itself, by neglecting the happiness and well being of those who live in it. by saturating them to intolerable stresses, that eventually the human system has no choice but to submit, i.e. by mentally breaking down, or expiring physically fatally by heart attack.

 The more I observe the effects of stresses, mainly psychological, then the realisation that manmade cirumstances, are actually contributing to death.

The money that can be saved by reducing the number of casualties that fall victim, can go to improving stress levels inflicted, by an overall stress management.
 

No I am staying

Life is like a balancing act, I can continue blogging, but not so obsessively, more casual. Its been good though, being a bit full on, as head cram packed with stuff, when you verbalise something and pass it on so to speak, it no longer becomes yours burden, I've passed that ball and now it is in someone elses court.Its been quite liberating, so I can now carry on without any guilt, as I dont like the 2I am alright Jack attitude.

east and west

Although ms is found in Japan and China it is much rarer in the Eastern countries. I think that has more to do with culture/lifestyle than anything else. Western life is particularly stressfull, in fact some people dont get any switch off time at all.

Meditation, yoga, thai chi, these are well known to help with those diagnosed with ms, why? because one realigns the mind, and the other two realigns the mind and body, but the feeling good factor will not last as the body is physically misaligned, due to the cervical spine being comprimised by the Atlas.

So its nothing to do with climate, genes, autoimmune, etc etc it all boils down to one tiny bone that funninly enough seperates the mind from the body.

So while the West encroaches or filtrates the East, it will then pass on its stresses and kindly take ms with them.

I have spent a lot of time recently thinking of the catalogue of everyday stresses, that people have nochoice but to endure, and it saddens me, that people work so hard to get money just to survive, no pleasure, nothing stressfree.

I was brought up in  the  60's, a very happy and free childhood, now children are surround by fear and pressures. Its hard to be a child these days and it shouldnt be.

Saturday 22 January 2011

havent relaxed for years

My body has been so tight for years now which hasnt help me  at all mobility wise, this morning I have just gone to pull my leg back by hand into a more comfortable position, and there was no resistance, it usually so rigid and stiff and took me by complete surprise. This is the start of a reduction of body tension now this I am looking forward to as hasnt happened for well I cant remember. And I have just moved my leg again as it may have reverted back. but no it hasnt now that is really good news

Heal from within

As I have learned during this last year is to heal myself within, drinking water I believe helps to clean the system, a bit like flushing you brakes. In this process  no drugs are required.

To Boldly Go

So I suppose I boldly go where no-one has gone before. Well I am up for that, for the first time  in years I am really confident in what I am doing, its a real education, which is funny really as school wasnt my favourite pasttime. But this is a subject I am interesed in.

But  those in the West should heed the Chinese way, and the respect of mind body and spirit I am learning so much. My body tells me so much, I am so in tune with it, its just brilliant. Our bodies warn us when we push them too far, we should all be confident to listen to our own system, we have the ability to know our own bodies better than anyone but in this modern society that exists, other things take priority and push us to the limit stress wise, and fill our heads with irrelevant stuff. when our bodies, our wellbeing and our families should be paramount, because without them we only have material things and nothing of any true value.

unchartered ground

I went to see John my chiro on Fri, and he is a little confused as to why my right side is so tight and bunched up,it doesnt seem to be for physical reasons. So he was going to consult a colleague who practices the Bowens Tecnique. But this morning I think that I have sussed it. I need to trust my bum particularly right side and start sitting more upright, its only a fractional shift, but it makes a big difference, to sit slightly back and to let my weight go down to my right buttock, so this I will practice.

I believe that John has got to the point where he cant ask anyone how  to sort it, is because we have now ventured into unchartered ground, nobody, nobody has been this far to this degree before. As my very first symptoms of the misaligned Atlas were bladder related, frequent UTIs, so when I went to the Doctor with this problem, her only avenue was MRI and because there was a lesion present I was then diagnosed with MS when in fact that was an incorrect diagnosis. Amazing but true, I would say I think, but I definitely know what the score is.

By the way I am not back, its just I just had something very relevant and new to say

So bottomline is  reoccuring UTIs are not necessarily MS related, as nor is a lesion on the spine or brain. Now that is revolutionary.

Also, I have now stopped visiting mss boards, as every post re ms, I have something in common with, not just one or two but all of them, oh except about fatigue, as never had that

Thursday 20 January 2011

200th post

As I believe I have said all that I can, and that there is no more that I can now say, I now bid a temporary goodbye to my blog. And get on with the job in hand of getting myself fixed.

I'm glad my children are safe

It seems that it is becoming quite common to confuse the patient with words terms etc.  they try so desperately to understand, so then turn to others for advice or help inunderstanding, it must be oh so confusing, when all they want to do is understand it all. But are left in a daze, its just not fair and some are so young too.

It must be awful for a parent who has spent years keeping their child safe from harm, for them then to be taken over and allowed to drown in a flawed and incompetant system.

You see with my theories, is not a case of anyone proving me right, just prove me wrong

a positive and a negative

So now people are finding their MRI is possitive, but their LP for o bands is negative, this is happening a lot, so keeping them in limbo while Neurologists desperately try to find something else to fit.

But all my evoked potentials etc were caused by stress covering up a misaligned Atlas. Let me go find a wall to bang my head on.

breathing is good

I used to suffer from many anxieties, now nothing really stresses me, only the fact that I contributed to the place I am in today, by being so compliant with others and trying so hard to please, I had become expert at walking on eggshells, the thing is I put me very last, at the back of the queue so to speak where I have stayed until now, I'm near the front now.

Anyway I digress, about breathing, as it is good to breath properly, but I noticed when I walked with my walker, it changed, and as it wasnt difficult enough, I kept stopping to breathe, I posted this on the website and found that others did it too, in one instance when crossing the road, you see how panick, stress and anxiety effects our breathing that makes the chosed task even harder and creates yet another loop.

I am lucky I have been able to cut myself off from that world that is outside, and have learnt not to get stressed. When you are in your own space that then affords you a choice of no stress, I have a very supportive family that at the mo have stepped into help me out, only with housy stuff nothing else. And its only for a limited period, so it wont be forever

Wednesday 19 January 2011

80% psychological 20 % real

As my pain was 80% psychological and 20% actual pain, pain killers would only have a less than 20% effect, not a complete effect.

A patient has been prescribed carbamazepine which is an anticonvulsant but does help trigemal neuralgia. but this particular patient doesnt suffer with TN. But other type pain, I'm not no Doctor but this seems an inappropriate medication to give someone who does not have TN or epilepsy, and the side effects seem to be quite serious.

Doctors have to stop using drugs on a trial and error basis, its not fair.

I cant really believe that the ms society havent had their boards observed by a Psychologist, as they may have come to the same conclusions that I know have. So much time has been wasted and so much damage has been caused to people, because of the inbuilt attitude of not looking for alternatives, now if thats not arrogant I dont know what is

A lot better now thank goodness

I woke up about 1 hr ago, with my right leg laying uncomfortably heavy on my left I felt very achey and a bit twisted. I then got up on all fours gently rocking backwards and forwards, but this gave me little relief. I then massaged my right side with my deep tissue massager,it was difficult and awkward at first, but after a while eased the discomfort. These past few days have been a bit tricky as seems like my right hip is stuck in its socket and not loose and flexible so has been incredibly uncomfortable, and I have been twisted at the hips meaning that my left was down hard on the chair and my right up. But I have only one more day to go until I see chiro so he can help sort me out. So looking forward to it. By the way I dont feel nowhere near as contorted as I did earlier so ten out of ten for my massager, what a relief phew!

Carry on regardless but heed the warning

Is ms being mentioned too early, it is on the ms website as it is unofficially confirmed by others by saying "sounds like ms to me" When perhaps what is required is for the individual needs to do, is forget it and continue regardless with  their life. As ignorance is bliss. Diving into the ms world is a bad thing, especially for the young,

If I took notice of my very first warning that my body gave me, I would never have had the second

Oh it hurts allright

I have noticed that people keep changing their Neuros perhaps because of something that they have said disagreable to the patient. At one time one said that MS doesnt cause pain, and in my own case 80% was psychological and 20% was down to the twisting caused by a misaligned Atlas, I still experience a certain amount but I know its only temporary until I'm fixed. Anyway its a pretty stupid thing to say to someone that has probably in the first place received a wrong diagnosis, to insinuate that their pain is not a real pain, what a load of complete tosh, I can assure them by experience, it is very very painful indeed, it may have been partly psychological but its a lot more complex than making a flippant statement, because all the pain that I had been suffering from was totally and absolutely down to the NHS making a wrong diagnosis, so they ought to stop upsetting people, and give them the help they deserve, Oh hang on they havent a clue what that is, so the fiasco continues, perhapse for another 30 years that seems to be the m.o.

Hips or back

Last time I went to see John my chiro, he wasnt sure whether he should concerntrate on lower back or hips.
As all seem connected, its def my lower back thats the problem, I have a pain slightly to the right, and something must shift, as have had moments of my hip loosening but it is because of something in m back and doesnt last. And at other times my legs go haywire, but it is always linked to my back.

If I lay on my front, my right leg will not go to the floor and calf is very painful, and sometimes there is a clicking in my lower back. My money is on that being the problem. Lets see on Friday eh!

I'd love to ask

A person suspected of MS for the last two years has now tested positive for  positive lupus anticoagulant. I wonder if this could be drug induced, as just plain old lupus can be, perhaps two totally diffferent, I would love to be able to join in on MSS limboland board, I would learn so much just by asking, what drugs do they take, I like looking into stuff, what a shame they banned me, as I am not interested for me,  I have worked that one out already, but I would like to invoke thought, and create debate like I was doing respectlfully as not to cause worry, you have to take great care in what you say and how you say it, you need to be protective of others.

You see its good to talk as Bob Hoskins used to say. Talking can create progress in many areas, what worries me about these boards is, the less experienced are asking others for their advice and accepting it as gospel, where it may be inaccurate.  There is a welcoming to the ms club with open arms warmth and good wishes, which is really nice and done with kindness but its done with an acceptance of the circumstance, and that is what worries me, in other words just sit and wait for a cure, thats the only hope. Well for those like me, it isnt.

The placebo effect

DMDs may be just an expensive placebo effect.

Does whiplash cause brain lesions

This is another question I cant find an answer to, brain damage yes with severe whiplash, but perhaps a lesser force causes a lesion.

I suppose this one will remain unanswered too

I wonder

This is just a wild idea, I cant find anything to suggest this. But what if the Epstein Barr Virus returns under the guise of fatigue possibly ongoing, I wonder if this particular virus on its return causes lesions on the brain to occur. I'll just have to wonder on that one I suppose.

Dont waste it

I was in a long term relationship, which was particularly stressful as the only consistant thing about it was inconsistancy. It was a constant guessing game as to what was happening, why had he forgot, why was he several hours late, and in reply was always a feesable excuse, I had become so accustomed to giving the benefit of the doubt it had beccome a habit, frequently there was a  problem, something else to worry about. I did my best to keep track but, the mobile was lost, out of charge, or left at the office, to him this was a constant game, we even lost our house through this double kind of life. Sometimes I would pray he would just hit me, but this he would not do, but at least I would know where I stood, and I would have walked. He was a stage performer too so another personality, plus he smoked extra daily. I can see the funny side of this now, but at the time I even had my hearing checked as I couldnt hear what he so obviously could. He was a multiple personality, dont get me wrong everybody loved him, he was funny kind and a gentleman, but there was another side, of catch me if you can, kind of one of "the untouchables" So this is to George

When you look in the mirror ,
Which one do you see.
Two, four or possibly three,
When it's finally, finally, you that you see,
 It's far too late to say sorry to me.

I suppose because of this reason is why I did not accept the MS diagnosis and all the doubts and uncertainty that came with it, many unanswered questions. Now that I would not accept, there is always a reason as to why things happen, as deep down I knew back then. So I think my past has in a way contributed to my future, a sad past but very exciting future. So good has prevailed and I cant wait until complete.

I suppose that there is another moral to the story, never ever waste all your well time, on something or someone that will never change for your good.

Life is about feeling SAFE and neither of these situations did that. For that I have to go way back to when I was a child walking in the woods with my Dad, my little hand in his that was a completely SAFE place to be, and I'm getting very close to feeling that way again.

Tuesday 18 January 2011

just re affirms

today i lay with my knees up on the settee, I was so relaxed I felt sleepy, then I made a fundimental mistake I shifted and moved my lower back, and immediately my legs twisted especially my left to the right, I had no control at all, it was quite scarey. But hey! just re affirms,  this is definitely something else not MS.

bladder/spasm

Before my bladder, definitely made my right leg flex/spasm, it would happen and only when I wanted to go to the loo.  My legs did flex at other times, but I was aware as and when that would happen as was connected to my back. the uncontrolled ones were due to my bladder

A good move

I am so pleased that certain responsibilities are going to be in Doctors hands this is such good news, and finally people wont be treated with that conveyorbelt, statistic mentality, and treated as real individuals, this is progress, Doctors have previously been sidelined and in a very difficult and a conflicting position in some cases. Keep everything communial (prob spelt wrong) that is so nice, so many people trek here and there to see a Neuro, it is so stressfull for them, and sometimes costly too.

Some people may disagree with this new idea, but to me, this means many progresses will be made. happy happy day for many

Also I would bother to email my blog to surgeries, but I just wouldnt bother with a Neuro as they are told what line to take and what attitudes to adopt, in other words it would be a waste of time, as those ears arent listening

Monday 17 January 2011

The need of a dictionary

emg negative, diseminated perpheral neuropothy, diabeted hypertention, IVIG, Jc virus, PML postpartum, Clonazapam, ON, Vasculitus, EVP, LP, demylination.

You need to have a medical exam to understand all the talk, plus this is only a small example. Its a whole new language out there.

It must be a constant researching for some people, talk  about fill your head totally to bursting point, perhaps having constant things to look up is bad for one, its not good.

A strange day

My symptoms before diagnosis which was just over 10 years ago which led to MRI, was afew UTIs, veering to the right, bumping into things, having to kneel on the floor after having bath, because of feeling dizzy, clumsyness, being generally off balance, couldnt carry two cups of coffee just not possible, I knew something was amiss. I went to diabetes clinic for results of MRI, so as we waited in the waiting room my sister and then husband, laughing and joking together, we then went in to see consultant/neuro. well soon wiped the smile off of my face, I thought the worst would be I'd be diabetic. At exact moment diagnosis was given, I experienced two emotions at exactly the same time, one was relief as I knew something just wasnt right, and the other was complete devestation, where zimmer frames and wheelchairs popped into my head, lucky my sister who is a nurse was with me, as at that moment I heard nothing of what was said, I was in a whole different broken world. Not a good day, not a good day at all.

Thank goodness, I now know very different, they messed up at my expense, but hey! I've survived the total mess that exists, I've systematically broken it all down, and now I know what needs to be done, so now I'm happy.

We will make you fit

Cats chase their tails, Neurologists chase a reason.

Apparently lesions have disappeared several years later, does that mean original diagnosis was a mistake, but the recipient still has various symptoms (like the ones I had) so that must mean a misdiagnosis took place, so another label is found, another illness will fit because they will make it. So there will be more and more diagnosed with perhaps rarer conditions, we will make it fit, and put them on a different list.

If I had a choice

If I had a choice in what I have been through over the last 10years, after receiving a wrong diagnosis.

Or being in Limbo,

I would pick the misdiagnosis every time, although it was the most terrible experience I could ever have been put through. At least now its over.

This could be good

Ordinary people are now speaking in medical language, they are becoming experts in using medical terms i.e. MRI results. It must be so hard, frightening and confusing for anyone newly diagnosed, itslike you have to take an exam.

I am really pleased that responsibility is to go from Neuros to Doctors on spending, as they will perhaps be able to look at the whole situation with fresh eyes, and will want to make some hopefully really good changes and investigations into alternatives, now this is where some serious progress could be made. Its really quite exciting and optamistic, the penny might finally drop, the dots may get joined buy our good doctors.

This is good news.

Sunday 16 January 2011

So much info

If someone had taken the time and trouble to observe the MSS website Limbolanders board, they would learn so much, not just from the topic itself, but the reaction and replies. Its only on this board that a true perspective is gained. It is so informative on how others feel and are being treated by the system.

Call me an onlooker, you learn a great deal

mistakes

When the powers that be realise that they have made a very, very costly mistake, not only to themselves. but to some very innocent people, and for years too, and based everything on one mans theory back in the 19th century. How silly are they going to feel. Trouble is wont feel too silly to all those who have been kept in limbo or misdiagnosed. cant invisage them guys going "mistakes happen" as that would be a bit of an understatement.

Now doesnt that make me happy to be in my shoes and not theirs

The only thing these people have in common is there coping mechanism as to regards stress, so their body gave them a warning that has been misinterpreted into an MS episode, where balance and co ordination was effected, in my case I adapted to it, and that is when I believe my Atlas became misaligned making it impossible to adapt back.

Others may have sustained a neck injury, may have just bumped their head, which then put pressure on the cervical spine which include the Atlas

side effect or symptom

Clonazepam for anxiety etc a couple of side effects are clumsyness, dizziness and unsteadyness plus slurred speech, how can anyone tell whats what. Are the prescribers of these meds causing more damage than good. And there are loads of other drugs that crossover this is just one example, its mind boggling

Epstein Barr

This subject comes up quite often on the mss site, Glandular fever also the Herpes virus there is some kind of link, perhaps lays dormant in the system and resurfaces as fatigue, I dont know there is some kind of link, but what it is I dont know, perhaps I'll do some digging, its worth a look.


Well looked and hey! bingo, cronic fatigue.

Chickenpox too lays dormant, how many links to this chain I ask, is it also linked to fatigue, I'll look and check again. Here goes.

Hey presto, chickenpox can cause fatigue also.

keep them guessing until something fits

Some people are left in "Limbo" for years 6, 7 even over 10, I can see exactly what's going on, its so wrong, these peple are no different than me at all apart from fatigue, that I ever had, mind you can be a side effect of some drugs, plus misaligned Atlas can cause, but not in my case thank goodness. The only difference is between them and me is I had a possitive MRI.

How do they know

If a Neurologist says to a patient that they have sustained demylination damage, how does he or she know, as that can only be assertained as a definite by autopsy, but the language a Neuro uses is always not 100% er, either using terms like i.e. probably, highly likely, it appears, etc etc always not 100%, thats very clever at covering themselves by leaving room for error, from a legal point of view, thats good, very good.

another for the pot

another one to be added to the ms/mess pot vaculitus, prob another clear MRI and LP has pointed in this direction, of after 7 years this person being told ms and now she has Vasculitus.

a different kind of message

Because at the moment, my bladder does not as yet receive messages that I need to go to the loo, the reason how I know (just realised this) is that whenmy right leg becomes slightly tight and I have kind of a sluggish slightly heavy feeling from my waste to my right leg. I have got so used to it I forgot to mention it, but as soon as I wee, the tension is released, This may be the pressure of my bladder causes, or I know this sounds silly or the bladder meridian.

Saturday 15 January 2011

Now Devics

Clear MRI and LP, need I say more, saw this one coming, no surprise there, as I said before perhaps original theory about why lesions appear was wrong.

Friday 14 January 2011

I should be asleep really

The only reason I am up now is when I woke up some of the fluidity which has returned in my hips, had gone and sitting up helps me to try and sit evenly on my hips, anyways I feel less tense afterwards,it seems to work, I should really be zzzzzzzzing it

kneecap area

Something that I have noticed in the last few weeks is the fleshy areas around my knee caps, these are soft fleshy areas around the kneecap, and to be honest I have never ever noticed them before and silly though this sounds perhaps they had retracted and have only just re emerged, as my knees have in the past months since having to crawl took an awful bashing and to be honest arent a pretty site just recently, but I have readjusted my crawling to work from the hips and cooncerntrate in that area, as before I wasnt. It had become much more controlled and a ltough still low at mo much easier. Whee as my head has been in my legs, I have now premoted them to my hips. I kept focussing on moving my feet forwards, but you walk from the hips, else amputees could never learn to walk again.

When ms vacates the mind, one can observe, take it in and adjust to it. Its all so fascinatingly interesting,

An awful situation for many

Please take a look at uk MSS limboland board at posting

"I am disgusted and angry at how some of you are being treated"

Says it all really, by the way I didnt write it, As you may think that it was me, it wasnt, my approach is a different one, as on this board (no-one no-one even the society itself) is taking any notice of whats going on, thats why someone without an ms diafnosis should be observing this board and taking notes, as this is where you will find out very real and factual up-to-date information of whats going on. Dont ignore what these people are saying, and dumping them to let them get on with it between themselves, as that is very very cruel indeed.

So those of standing from the UK take note.

yet another catch 22

Does an MS diagnosis make you a constant "drugs guinea pig" and manages to keep yet another catch 22 situation going as one side effect becomes tomorrows symptom, and they are so wrapped up in the medical side of things (the powers that be that is) they cannot see what actually stands before them. And on top of their victims troubles they cause them more stress related issues, by Neuro appts after Neuro Appointment, desperate to keep them off the MS list, even in limbo for years. They are causing the people they profess to help even more problems.

So my conclusions in my case are  misaligned atlas/hidden by stress both psychological and physical/misaligned bladder meridian/pressure on pressur points/resulting in MS MISDIAGNOSIS

But thats just me, or is it

I know people are neither going to like or accept what I am saying, and I may stand alone, as no-one dare say anything else accused of being in denial.

High cost of getting it wrong

Perhaps the NHS has got to such a point of realisation, that MS is an escalating and uncontrolable cost, from scientists to treatments is actually breaking them. Even perhaps to the degree, that Neurologists are suggesting coming off DMDs if no relapses, now this in itself to me is a massive mistake as the idea of a DMD may be having a placebo effect upon the patient, withdraw the idea, you may bring on a relapse (totally stress related problems mess not ms) so the expenses will rise in other areas such as support i.e. ms nurses - OTs and help aides.

Whichever way you look at it all costs are high, particularly to others like me and its an awful lot if not all

You cannot CURE whats been made up over the years. Mad but I think its true

Now dystonia

You see I made a mistake and viewed  limboland board. So whats the latest then, what are they pinning on now, its not Neurologists fault but those above. So here the next episode in this catalogue of misdiagnos (the plurel)


                                                                    DYSTONIA

now I can relax

I know approx 20 different countries have viewed this blog, how good is that.
I have said everything possible uptil today discovery.
So I can now relax, and stand down from red alert.
And now its def time to start to relax, something I havent been able to (many dif issues oodles in fact) do for approx 20 years.

So now  I will enjoy

bye bye for now

Its time to stop barking up that wrong tree

Elizabet Quigly- Scotland and MS

In my opinion its only genetic as in personalitywise - re stress
Again to me MS as discribed today does not exist..

I wish they saw the bigger picture, but they didnt

So I read story after story of frustrated and at the end of their tether people on the MSS Limboland board, deep down knowing visiting this blog will help, in the self help, self hope department. I would just like all that view my blog that I am banned from using this particular site, I did fight my corner and returned many times under different guises, but that insider clickyness through the ranks prevailed, I had no chance of breaching that block.

Anyway, I can see how it has all got to the stage it has with Neuros not being able to diagnose through the lack of possitive MRIs an LPs. Even the possitives I have experienced up until now, have been incredible to my quality of life. If I posted my blog on the site the mear fact it has Fiona in its title would warrent its deletion, thats how sadly determined they are, to silence me at all costs.

To me those costs are high so what do I do, I have to rely that sooner or later my blog will be learned by word of mouth, but I want to make it clear for legal reasons, that may arise in the future that its not me at fault.

It really bothers me to read others accounts of degradation and upset, that I at one time not long ago I too experienced, It really effected me, but I have had to harden because I am my only proof, to prove it publically, I have to do it by walking. This is just were I ramble on with my ideas

All in hand, don't pannick

So an hour ago I was thinking that I need to find an acupuncturist who practices the Chines way quick quick quick, as not all practise the Chinese way ( hey! is that modern man wanting to scap one or two thousand years of experience, now they need to get with the program.)

Anyways I have through John my Chiropractor purchased a deep tissue  massager, yesterday was the first day I was relaxed enough to access the goin area around the top area of both legs mainly concerntrated on right,
now was that a coincidense to my previous posts experience. I dont think so. I have just done the same thing going from the very top of my thigh down to my ankle, and has a spasming effect (a bit painful,) but def has an effect.

As I was to ill to se John today, I will concerntrate on doing this for a week, and just see how it goes results wise. I am smiling as I type so perhaps that is a indication eh! who knows

Oh and I am drinking water, not copious amounts just about a litre and a half, just to flush out any nasty stuff.

medical route or The Chinese way

There is always a reason that I get dragged back to this blog, but hey! this one is relevant.

Last night I laid down on the settee and managed to eventually straighten my right leg, well did I then fall asleep or pass out, the latter I think. Anyway when I woke up, I kept as my son put it dozing off, but I just couldnt help it. I thought that I must have an infection in my pelvic area as felt sore, plus I could hadly move, My son started to pannick by shoving me really hard to wake me up as I wasnt responding it took a long time. Anyway then I dragged myself to bed, It was like my head was working but my body wasnt. Anyway |I slept til morning, but immediately wet myself, anyway sorted myself out and went and struggled to bed. My right leg kept extending and I couldnt stop it, this was incredibly painful especially in my lower back and my calf. I started to do some really gentle movements prob all used in yoga, just gentle rocking from my lower back area, forward sideto side and round.

So my conclusions are my twisting is not only due to a misaligned Atlas, but because of the bladder meridian.I thought that I had found my final piece in my puzzle, and my walking was the first thing to be effected so will be the last to return. But it wasnt the BLADDER was.

For years the western world has kind of shunned and discounted Chinese medicine which has taken thousands of years to develop as it is today. it is so relevant and important and deserves a enormous respect. So I am going to heal my body from within, and no, medicine has no place here. but the Chinese way of thinking does. To tell you the honest truth if someone told me about Chiropractors, Accupuncture, relaxation techniques and the Chinese way, I would have thought, I cant afford time for all that malarky, but now knowing what I do now, I couldnt afford not to.

So off I go to heal from within.

Thursday 13 January 2011

I'm going to back off now

As I have achieved what I have wanted to for a long time, and to mention my alternatives. And there is nothing more to research. I have decided to leave this blog until I walk or stand unaided. As I am in danger of becoming incredibly boring, going on and on, and to be honest I could do with a break ok. Thanx for listening "over and out"

Wednesday 12 January 2011

here comes another

yet another condition thrown into the diagnosis pot  "charcot marie tooth disease" somebody has been diagnosed with both, there are definite crossovers here it like they are both the same condition, its abnormalities in the mylen sheath, so I suppose until autopsy they cant tell anything yet again for definite, this is another condition discovered in th 19th century, yet again has this theory been investigated and challenged recently as to its existance. Or is this another ball that they are going to blindly run with, and ignore especially the coverup by stresses caused upon the body both physical and psychological that manage to hide an underlying issue.

I have just done a little skim/bottom line reading, and this fits me perfectly especially the hip dysplasia and scoliosis, I will write these down and ask Chiro if in his professional oppinion this is what I have as its practically me. Best I dont take all this on board, as would really do a sane persons head in, how do they cope with all this info as loads to read up on pages in fact. Talk about grabbing at straws, but this effects peoples lives, but perhaps they are trying to make this one fit as it effects younger people apparently back to childhood.

medicate to soon

In many ways perhaps we medicate to soon, our bodies fight and heal in many ways.

I reckon mine is healing in a way, gradually after every manipulation, my spine has been very sore at times, even to the point I kept nodding off or passing out, another time I felt physically sick, my temperature kept going up or under it was strange, but hey! I survived and am still here, how I was doesnt bear thinking about, now I dont think I would cope at all, but because it happened gradually over a period of time I could stand it, people say its a hidious illness, and yes I can understand that, but I dont see it like that because to me it doesnt exist anymore. And when I have to crawl from room to room and it get s me down, I say out loud "Its temporary Fiona it's temporary, and that makes me feel very grateful indeed, very grateful

My book is here

The book the healer within is here and a quote is: the most profound healing resourses  are produced within us Dr Jahnke has createda beatiful  bridge to the domain of th Chinese self-healing arts, ancient mind/body secrets accssible to everyone.


I'm really going to enjoy this book. And dont knock it until you try it.and that is a quote from me

More women

More women get an ms diagnosis than men. Well thats a hard one, stress yet again.

best left unread

I have just come accross some writing and notes that I made 4-8 years ago, because there were many psycholigal changes and physical little things I noticed, I knew nothing that I now know and because I didnt understand as at the time I though everything was psychological, especially when I would have really good moments, but as the stress slowly returned that feel good factor left me. Now it all makes sense as to why, then I was quite distressed and concerned, because I thought it was all my fault, when in fact now I know tha it was not. I've decided to put it all away, and read it after I have reached my goal of walking, no need to go over old ground at the mo. To read it I relive it, not something today I wish to do

Tuesday 11 January 2011

Just seventeen

I have just looked at young persons board, and a seventeen year old has just been diagnosed with ms. Personally I would tell her to stay off the mss website and go and get on with her life, but to definitely address any stress issues that she may have, that she actually is not aware that she has, to take some kind of relaxation therapy. The trouble is just being on the site alone will fill her head to the maximum of all that is ms www. this and that, theres loads of advice and empathy but she needs to stay out of that way of life. Was she diagnosed on her second ans her first stressful experience was  traced back into childhood, perhaps puberty or exam time. This just isnt fair when are they going to back off the kids and help them deal with just the stress issue, by teaching them stress avoidance tactics.

My first blip was 7 years before being diagnosed, ms was never ever mentioned didnt even cross my mind, I went desensitised down my left side, but eventually went, just leaving a little residue in tips of fingers of my left hand, it was put down to depression which fitted in at the time and off I went continued as normal with my life, even having my third child. Ignorance was bliss. If I knew what I do now I would have made some changes and addressed the stress issue and send her on her way. This is all so wrong, very, very wrong and these are kids lives they ar playing with, its just wrong.

It has to be realised that the everyday STRESS issue which eventually builds up, must be addressed, I think the human body can only sustain and deal with a certain amount, and then eventually the systemfalters under the strain, perhaps in the form of a fatal heartattack. damaging stress needs to be addressed in society, it is all around us and there is no escape or relief and that is where the damage occurs, not giving any kind of respite in letting us recover, tablets and medication to cover up the issues doesnt fix the problem. We should enjoy life not dread it, we need to pay this a great deal of respect as will kill or be disabling for many, and the financial cost of that is enormous.

Why not fatigue

The only common ms symptom I didnt have was fatigue, why, I looked into drug induced Lupus as I think this can cause fatigue, but I dont recognise any of the inducement drugs, and it indicates that some anti seizure drugs can but I am not sure what they are, and if they are given to ms patients, there might be a link somewhere, but it is too early in the morning to carry on investigating.  So off I trot or slither to bed.

Perhaps gabapentin is the link, a friend suffers from severe fatigue, I'll quiz her tomorrow, perhaps its something else, that would just be too simple.

funny day

Had a two step back day today, not as good as yesterday,but better than the day before, not all doom and gloom. Was going to leave it two weeks to see my Chiro but as my hips seem to be a bit wonky again right hip seems stiff, so have decided to go this week instead.  Onwards and upwards, puts a smile on this cried out at times face.

Autopsy to confirm theory

Because meylin damage can only be established after death by autopsy, you would think that this had been done on a regular basis over the last 30 years to re affirm the original theory, but this doesnt seem to have been done.

neck to legs

This happens sometimes still, not now as often, but when I would put my hair in a ponytail, the movement in my neck would cause my right leg to flex and I would slump to the floor.

I am aware that my neck and right leg are very much connected movement wise. 

Monday 10 January 2011

sitting straight

I am going to lay of the computer for the day as I am going to concerntrate on sitting up straight and not leaning slightly forward.

How did I know

How did I know that I didnt have ms what really convinced me at the start.
In ms the meylin sheath sustains damage which causes some kind of misfiring, well I knew if my leg flexed/spasm I was aware of when it was going to happen, as I had an indication of an ache/pain that I had hit a certain spot in my back. If my meylin was misfiring I would be aware by its unpredictability alone.

Its been a good day

Even though my right hip aches when crawling, my back pain hasnt returned. I am hoping that tomorrow wont be one of those 2 steps back days, but I anticipate that happening. But not a bad day at all, pretty good.

So typical

Just been peeking at mss Limbo board and there is a post titled "this is rediculous"  exactly the kind of situation I'm on about, clear tests, symptoms but no diagnosis, she or he is now cross and stressed, a big no no as far as  I am concerned, as stress just adds to the mess. These people need some answers, there is loads of them, left hanging on, clear tests if I was in charge, I would definitely get her Atlas checked, but I know many people are very sceptic about Chiropractors and not everyone can afford to go privately, I couldnt, but I couldnt afford not to. Thats why they should be available through the NHS, they could help with no end of problems, back ache, hip problems, the knowledge they have as to regards the human body is so useful, I just cant believe that they have been excluded, its just madness.

Pain in the neck

As I have been very aware as to what happens to my body, I will try to explain, I am sure much of my neck pain emulated from a tension in my upper right, but I was also aware that the discomfort in my neck was also connected to my lower back where again I had pain, I also had discomfort/pain in my upper, upper part of my right arm and could not put it in the positions that I can do now without pain/discomfort. My knee has also hurt, but now does not, and if I knocked my right knee, by landing on it too hard my right leg would violently spasm and quite painful too, but would lock tight for a while but that has only stopped in the last few days. So many things used to happen I cant quite remember all of them, but when I do I will note them as all incredibly relevant. The tension in my upper back caused my leg to judder/tremor I know this as when raised my arm to the side horizontally it would stop. Also I would have a tightness in my right leg when I wanted a wee, and as soon as I started the was a release of feeling, now I believe that had something to do with the bladder meridian. So the bladder meridian, pressure points, (which some are too in the lower back area) and misaligned Atlas, wow its no wonder I had problems
Also putting your sox on, its not about just raising foot to hand, its about being flexible in your upper back to be able put hand to foot. It used to take me 1/2hr to get my shoes on, it was such a difficult thing to do. today my left is ok, right is a bit tricky, but now takes me 5 mins to get my shoes on, and today have got sox on too, now thats progress.

Sunday 9 January 2011

no lower back pain

I woke several times in the night laying heavy on my left hip which was uncomfortable, but the surprising thing was that I could easily shift position so I could include laying on my whole thigh which took the pressure off. Also my lower back pain has gone, my right hip when I crawl is stiff and uncomfortable though but hey! I can live with that one at the mo. my right leg is stiff but I shall continue massaging with the deep tissue massager today to try and release it a little, but again so far so good. I havent tried to straighten my right leg as still probably tight and sore and dont want to cause it uneccessary damage. I still have clickiness in my neck and upper back but no pain just an achey right hip at mo.

appreciate life

Its funny because of what I have been through, makes me appreciate and respect life much more, all life, I watched the antics of an ant, busy going about his business, I like the way they always pick up a fallen comrade and take him back to camp. I watched a snail after it had rained, how its antennas popped in and out when you gently touched them. Sad though it sounds these things facinated me, probably because I couldnt do much else than to watch them. I shall never kill an ant regardless, as he has a very busy role in an ants day, to distroy all that effort would be rude of me. Dont get me wrong I know I cant go on in life never killing a creature again, but I wont go out of my way to do it deliberately. Over these last few years I have learnt so much and I have spent so very very long seeing nothing just experiencing a catch 22 of the psychological effecting the physical, the physical effecting the psychological an endless loop, I'm so glad that I managed to get off that particular round about. It was a bit like being buried alive, only being buried alive you air runs out  and you are eventually put out of your misery. I couldnt see beyond ms/mess it just wouldnt let me, but today I see and see it all.

Upright puzzle

My fundamental problem in standing is my weight doesnt yet go down through my body to the floor, Tension in my back prevents me from rolling my shoulders up round and down, and the tightness in my right calf muscle, actually feels as if it is ripping and does hurt when I try to straighten leg, but as tension is released in other parts of my body, this will rectify. I know this as the other day I wway laying quite relaxed and my leg immediately straightened no pain, this happening took me aback as wasnt expected, unfortunately once I was consciously aware of it, it didnt happen again and reverted back to as it was, it was like I was given a taster of how good it will be. I take it my body is like an upright puzzle and one day will just all fit into place, then no problem

No stress no MS

Where there is no stress, you wont find ms

The placebo effect

When I was first diagnosed I was offered Rebif and I did inject for a while, but as I didnt stick to the routine and kept missing injections, I dont think that I had total faith in it,  I then decided, as I was not using it correctly, I decided to stop.

Since knowing my diagnosis of Remitting relapsing, I never went into full remission, I have had ongoing bladder and balance issues, I doubt anyone fully remits, if there are alternative underlying issues. Some may look ok on the outside, but inside they are twisting.

I think DMDs and LDN have a placebo effect, therefore any statistics of how much they reduce episodes, is a false account, theres no possible way of knowing.

And I imagine that a very high percentage of people inevitably become wheelchair bound, because misalignment of the bodys structure make it impossible to stand. Even walking with a stick for me was all wrong, I couldnt do that, as I had no walking rythm, I was wonky.

I have a tai chi and yogalates video that I purchased three years ago, unopened as it is futile to excercise when wonky, I'll wait til I am straight.