Its kind of funny, that a tiny bone that stands between my head and my body has caused me so many complex knock on effects.
Our bodies are like a piece of incredible exact engineering, if one componant is out just a fraction of a mm, it renders the whole system US (unserviceable)
I believed for many years that I couldnt walk properly for psychological reasons.
I had a dream where a gun was held to my daughters head when she was little, and I was told if I wallk to her, she wouldnt die, a request I knew I could not complete no matter how hard I tried and those familiar eyes from that tiny beautiful face looked back at me, as always asking me as her Mum, to make it all better, as I had always only ever done her whole life.
But I knew this time I couldnt help her, and this made me feel a total failure as her Mum, I would then wake up, therefore not made to witness, what I was powerless to stop, my heart broken, and so distressed for years
But today I know without any doubt , that I couldnt have saved her, because it wasnt physically possible.
Now I finally know what I am dealing with, and what needs to be done, this time I am in control, in what will happen in my future, and when its all sorted I will walk over to her and give her the biggest hug that I ever have.
And that makes me feel the Mum I am. So for all similar Mums and their little girls like my Kimberly, I will make myself heard, no matter what
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